I love jokes.

And these are my favorite kinds of jokes. Yes, I'm taking these directly from a forwarded email, but I don't even care because they're funny! So enjoy.

o What is out on the lawn all summer and is Irish?
Patty O'Furniture.

o What do you call a fake stone in Ireland?
Sham rock.

o When is an Irish Potato not an Irish Potato?
When it is a French fry.

o What does it mean when you find a horseshoe?
Some poor horse is going barefoot.

o Why did the elephant wear his green sneakers instead of his red ones?
His red ones were in the wash.

o Why is a river rich?
Because it has two banks.

o Why did St. Patrick drive all the snakes out of Ireland?
He couldn't afford plane fare.

o What do you call a diseased Irish criminal?
A leper con.

o What do you call a leprechaun's vacation home?
A lepre-condo!

o What do you call a leprechaun with a sore throat?
A streprechaun!

o What do elves learn in school?
The elf-abet!

o What's an Irishman who keeps bouncing off walls called?
Rick O'Shea.

Almost 25 and still getting Easter baskets.

Even though the package showed up looking like this:


















Nothing was harmed and it is still awesome!

















Thanks parents.

No green thumb here.

At the beginning of last semester I decided to get a plant. I picked an easy one- African violet. It was pretty and I put it in a cute self-watering pot. I opened the shades to give it light. But it stopped flowering, and has not flowered since. Maybe that's the way African violets go, but I wanted a flower, not a green thing. It's like my dislike for cats- I prefer dogs who give me attention and make me feel good about myself. Instead of giving me pretty flowers and making me feel good about myself, my African violet has really let me down. Or maybe I've let it down, but whatever. Today leaves started falling out of it. They still look green and plump and all, but they just fall out. My grandparents will read this and shake their heads at my poor plant-owning abilities. Yet even as I complain I don't really care enough to figure out the problem- get a bigger pot? More water? Less water? More sun? Plant food? It's all too much trouble.

keepin' stock in stock

I have discovered lately the need to keep chicken and/or vegetable stock, well, in stock. (Okay, after typing the first sentence I got confused and checked my pantry to see if it's really called "stock," and my store-bought cans are called "broth," but I assume those are the same, and if they're not, um, that's embarrasing.) This is because I like making vegetable soups. We all know my favorite is butternut squash soup, but I have also made cauliflower soup and tonight I made carrot soup! It was no butternut squash soup, let me tell you, but it was still good. I also ate some asparagus and two biscuits. Pretty good dinner I would say. However, the thing about cooking at this point in my life is that too often the act is synonymous with procrastinating.

blue skies

It's sunny and warm out. That makes me extra excited. Even if I'm not even going outside of my apartment today, I still appreciate all the daylight and warmth. "Hey Spring, let's be friends okay?"

Pictures!

saw lots of sights

So my New York trip is almost over. We checked out of the Carlyle today and Ryan flew home, so that is sad. I miss him already. We had a pretty good time.

Let me think...I think I last updated on Wednesday. So Thursday we walked through Central Park and visited the Natural History museum, which was pretty awesome. Then we went to Soho and Ryan bought some clothes, and then we wandered around there and Chinatown for a really long time until some friends met us for dinner. Then Friday we slept in, visited the Met, went to the ginormous Macy's (Ryan did more shopping), and went to MoMA. Oh, then dinner in Little Italy. This morning we got up and visited KMart so Ryan could buy a cheap suitcase to carry all of this extra clothes back home, and then we had to check out. He drove away in a cab, and I took the bus across town to meet my friend Keith for lunch, which was great. It's so fun to see these good friends and even though we haven't seen each other in a few years we jump right back in as if no time has passed! After lunch I stopped by the Carlyle one last time to get my bag, then took a cab to Celia's house in Brooklyn. That's where I am now. Her dad made chicken for dinner, just like old times in Santa Fe. Tomorrow we plan to visit the Whitney Biennial (which I saw last time I was here!) before I fly back to Richmond.

So that's that. I'll post a few pictures when I'm home- Ryan was our official photographer and I think we got some fun ones.

Signing off,
Andi

more updates on our fabulous time in New York

This will be quick, because Ryan is not amused with my blogging as we sit here in the "business center," but today was pretty exciting.

We walked around Times Square.

We ate a Reuben and pickles at the Carnegie Deli.

We visited F.A.O. Schwartz.

Ryan bought a soda from Rupert himself at the Hello Deli.

We saw Wicked. It was great.

We came back to the hotel and got slightly dirty looks walking through the "Gallery" in our jeans.

But when we came back for dinner dressed in a sweet black suit and black dress, they were more impressed. Ryan had fish, I had a delicious veal chop, and we had dessert. We also got a special appetizer "compliments of the chef" thanks to Ryan's status as the "internal guest of the year."

Two and a half hours later, we were done with dinner, and after this short trip to the "business center" to chat with you all, we're headed back up to our fancy room.

So this is how the other half lives...

Ok guys, Ryan and I are in New York and staying at the Carlyle, most likely the fanciest hotel I will ever stay in in my entire life. I got in yesterday several hours before Ryan and stopped by the hotel to drop off my bags. Right away the ladies at the desk were very nice, and they knew I was Ryan's sister and he was bringing me for my graduation and yadda yadda yadda. They had a fancy room picked out for us way up on the 30-something floor with an amazing few of Madison Avenue and Central Park and the rest of the city. However, the room was so small that the two twin beds were pushed together to make one big bed. So instead we have a much bigger and just as nice room over-looking Madison Avenue, but down on the fourth floor. They brought us a tray of fresh berries and chocolate covered strawberries, and we've both already made use of the big white robes.

Anyway, after I dropped off my bags and had my personal tour of the place, I went walking forever and ever. Finally with very tired feet I headed back to the hotel for a short nap, then Ryan arrived and right after that my friend Celia arrived! So we sat in our room admiring how fancy it all is. Then we headed to the East Village for dinner and walked around a little, and then it was home to bed. I'm feeling slightly sick so my body gets tired and achy pretty quickly with all this walking, but hopefully I'll get back to normal soon.

Ooh, and here's the most awesome part...on our way back into the hotel last night Ryan and I stopped by the cafe downstairs to peek in because...get this...Woody Allen was playing the clarinet! So I looked at him for a few minutes, but Ryan wasn't interested because he sees famous people all the time at his hotel in Santa Fe and has become snooty about it.

Today we got up and headed way down to the South Street Seaport and Battery Park, but really just walked around a lot and didn't actually go into anything. Except for the huge discount clothing store that was full of Europeans buying fancy clothes. Ryan bought a suit because he wants us to eat at the restaurant here at the hotel but he needs a jacket for that. Seriously, we're not nearly fancy enough for this place.

Anyway, I'm in the business center now using the free internet, because using wireless from our room costs $15 a day! You'd think the fancy hotel would give free wireless... So I'm about to go back up for a short rest, then we'll probably go out and eat with Celia and her sister.

Sorry this post was more like a mass email than an exciting blog...maybe I'll have fun pictures to post when I get back.

Tata for now!

These happen to be on my camera. And, I like them.

Weekend Review

Friday: Read, went to school to listen to Natalie Zemon Davis and Jonathan Spence, (famous historians of early France and China, respectively), read at a coffee shop, watched The Return of Martin Guerre (starring Gerard Depardieu) at school and listened to Davis talk about the work she did on it, went out with the video store gang.

Saturday: Slept in, spent a billion hours at the mall helping Tess look for a suit jacket, read briefly, celebrated Elizabeth's birthday with the girls by eating at Mellow Mushroom and going ice skating!

Sunday: Read, read more, went to church and the grocery store, watched the Oscars, read a tiny bit more.

Did I tell you?

I don't know if I've shared this with you, dear internet readers, but the truth is...I have a thing for old men. Not a romantic thing, just an I-think-they're-awesome thing. I like to watch old men, and talk to old men, and I especially like portraits of old men.

I don't really know what it is about old men that makes me like them. But I do. Once in college I played Bingo at a retirement home and this really great old man next to me kept making jokes, like "B4 what?" I laughed every time. Then he told me stories about his logging days.

Only this other time at a different retirement home I played the piano while some folks ate dinner and afterwards this old man came up to me and said his wife used to teach piano so he heard every mistake I made. He was an old man I didn't like.

Another time I saw a whole slew of old men in cute white sweaters lawn bowling at a park in London. I hid behind bushes and took pictures.

I think my affinity for old men might also have something to do with my love for history. I could spend hours looking at presidents at the National Portrait Gallery.

P.S. I hope that my writing "old men" isn't offensive. I definitely mean no offense. I think "awesome old men" sounds much better than something like "elderly men," or "senior men."

Headed to the Big Apple!

Remember when my brother Ryan won a free trip? Well, fancy beach resorts were already full during my spring break. Then we thought about Tokyo, but that was when his hotel tried to take his free trip away from him. We were mad. But Ryan made a deal with them, and our new (and booked and flights-paid-for) plan is to go to New York City! And according to my guidebook, the hotel where we're staying is listed as the number two best hotel in New York. Upper East Side by Central Park. I'm just sayin'.

Ryan is the best brother in the whole world. He could give two flips about visiting New York, but he's taking me there because he knows I love it. He'll have fun, too, though. I hear there is a museum where you can walk on ships. That sounds awesome. And my friend Celia lives there, now with her dad and sister (Ryan went to school with her sister), so we'll get to see them and have good times. You may recall what happened last time I visited Celia in New York...

And now, in preparation for mingling with the rich and famous at our fancy hotel, I think I'll need to run my purple Converse through the wash.

Weekend Review

Friday: Worked on shortening my conference paper some more and practiced reading it slowly. Went to the art museum, just for fun. Went to school and helped set up for the conference for three hours. Home to watch a movie.

Saturday: Up early to get to the North Carolina Graduate Student History Conference. Ran the technology for Tess's panel, listened to Gabriel's panel, ate lunch, and ran the front desk (about three people walked in) during the third session. Then it was my turn. This other guy read a paper, then I read my paper, then the commentator talked for so long that there was no time left for questions. But it went well. I got good feedback from people and it was a good experience. After eating some cheese and veggies, helped take down the conference by moving a bunch of furniture around again (and breaking three nails in the process). Home for a nap and dinner, then out to Mitch's with lots of students, and then out on Glenwood with the girls. Home late.

Sunday: Slept in a lot, generally lazed about, went to church, watched another movie.

Did you hear the one about the "toe" truck?

A handful of cash and an entertaining ride to Cary with the tow truck man later, I am now back in possession of my car! And that lot across from school where I've been parking occasionally for the past semester and a half? Well, maybe I won't park there anymore.

some things I like:

Oreos
fields of tulips
temporary tattoos
croissants
bluegrass
portraits of old men
hot pink
Shirley Temple drinks
big windows
lobsters

it's the little things

This weekend I got some work done! I wrote five pages which finished a rough draft of my section on the California Trail, so that was not a lot but still exciting.

Then to reward myself I went for a drive in the country! I saw cute little towns and a sign for a strawberry patch and a sign for goat milk soap for sale and a sign for pancakes! I also saw real live buffalo! And it was a beautiful day, topped off with sharing a cinnamon roll the size of my head.

Today I got a new tooth. When you're a kid and you lose a tooth you put it under your pillow and wake up with money! But if you're me, and one of your baby teeth never falls out or gets replaced with an adult tooth, not only don't you get money under your pillow but you take many months and many dollars and many dentist appointments to finally get a tooth. Now that process is finally over!

tonight's dinner:

pistachios
apple sauce
chips and salsa
Skittles
coffee

When you think about it, that covers several important food groups...

Never Have I Ever

Back in the day I had the nickname Miss PP. I'm talkin' junior high days. While PP might conjure images of something entirely different it actually stood for Propriety Police. I kept the other kids on their toes. No littering, no talking with your mouth full, no bad language. Writing this makes me think I must have been pretty obnoxious, which was probably true, but I also know it was all in fun- they liked calling me Miss PP and I didn't mind it either.

The thing about being Miss PP, however, is that you automatically set yourself up on a dangerously high pedestal.

Take, for example, the day we played Never Have I Ever. In case you don't know, Never Have I Ever is a game in which lots of people sit in chairs in a circle, and one person stands in the middle and says something they have never done before (like "never have I ever beat Super Mario Brothers," or "never have I ever been to Topeka"). Anyone else who has done that thing gets up and runs to another seat, and the person left standing takes a turn saying something they've never done. During one particular game of Never Have I Ever someone announced that they had never...I hesitate to write it...peed in a swimming pool. Now that I think about it that person must have been lying, because what little kid has never peed in a pool? So naturally everyone else got up and ran for a new seat, and making the conscious decision not to be a liar myself, I got up and ran.

Only I ran too slowly. Sure enough, me, Miss PP, was the only one left without a seat. I was mortified. And ironically, my nickname became doubly fitting.

Weekend Review

Friday: Woke up (in Richmond) and worked on my conference paper, went to an Indian buffet (my favorite ever) for lunch with the grandparents, a little more work on the paper mixed with puttering around, went to First Fridays and Cafe Gutenberg afterwards.

Saturday: Slept in, visited with Uncle Richard, learned to play a song on the ukulele, had everyone over for a big fancy lunch that included special spoons for digging marrow out of bones, took a nap, saw Strange Wilderness and really miss those 8 bucks, ate at the Waffle House, had a dance party in aunt's kitchen.

Sunday: Slept in, ate lunch, went to ukulele store and almost bought a tenor but will save the idea for my birthday, hung out with the young folk to watch the Superbowl and play Scrabble.